Posts Tagged Marriage

A Christian Sex Site – The Ugly

Sorry for the long break in posts; I took a short trip to NYC and as soon as I got home I was knocked out by a cold for a few days. I’m feeling a bit better now, so hopefully I’ll be able to post a bit more often.

In the final part of the three-part series I’ve been doing about this site (parts one and two), today I’m going to address the parts of this site that are truly ugly. Some of them are not particularly the fault of the site’s authors, except insofar as they don’t really question the ugliness of the cultural norms that they’re repeating. Others are just disturbing.

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A Christian Sex Site – The Bad

In my previous post, I looked at The Marriage Bed and pointed out some of the parts that can be helpful to many people, regardless of whether or not they believe in the basic tenets of conservative Christianity and/or biblical literalism. Today I want to take a more critical look at this site and see what parts of it are potentially harmful or incomplete.

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A Christian Sex Site – The Good

I ran across The Marriage Bed the other day. It’s a pretty interesting site, and worth taking a look at if you can get past and/or accept its assumptions about marriage and interpretation of the Bible. They attempt to offer “a safe place for married Christians to discuss sex”, and also offer some articles target to young/unmarried people about waiting until marriage for sex.

I should say to start with that I don’t agree with several of their claims about how marriage and sex should be, and I definitely don’t read the Bible as literally as they do. I also think that some of the ideas that result can be harmful; I’ll discuss those in a later post. Nonetheless, I think that even without accepting those assumptions there is a fair deal to be gained from any discussion of sexuality that treats its audience as responsible, thinking adults. This one does just that, showing a refreshing amount of critical thought from a group whose loudest voices are too busy shouting “NO!” to listen to any objections. Here’s a few of the insights that I think many people could find helpful.

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Settling

Fillyjonk at Shapely Prose mentioned a somewhat horrifying article at the Atlantic arguing that women should “settle” for marrying someone they don’t necessarily love now (in their 20s) rather than waiting until they’re 35 and desperate to marry someone – anyone – in a quest to avoid spending the rest of their life alone. Pandragon has already done a good job tearing it apart, but I’d like to add a few thoughts of my own. The article itself is 4 pages long, so for those who’d like to save their sanity for more important things, I’ll just pick some choice parts.

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